How To Relax and How Relaxing Helps Reduce Stress
- Terri Kern
- Jun 4
- 6 min read
Updated: Aug 24
I was born into the BEST family; I'm super into my family genealogy and I'm so proud of the people in my tree! My parents, Ernie and Bunny, gave the five of us Kern kids the most amazing childhood.
Bunny was a badass; not only was she a great cook, seamstress, plumber, electrician, painter, teacher, singer, and coach, but she was also clever and hilarious. Ernie was kind and loving - he was a great father and the BEST girl dad. They loved each other and were BFFs, which set the five of us up for success in our adult lives.
They also passed on severe anxiety and attention deficit and hyperactivity to the five of us.
Mood and attention disorders like ADHD and anxiety are hardwired in our brains; genetically and through the learned behaviors of the parents we get it from. While we can't help our brain's neurospicy wiring we can build skills to help us overcome most of the challenges we face going through life with less distress tolerance.
The key to all good mental health is relaxation.
Relaxation: A state of calmness and freedom from tension, both physically and mentally.
In our fast-paced world, feelings of anxiety and overwhelm can often sneak into our everyday lives. Whether you're managing stress from work, dealing with chronic pain, or simply trying to find a moment of peace, it is vital for your well-being. One of the most effective strategies for achieving relaxation is through guided exercises.
This blog post will guide you through simple relaxation techniques that help calm both your mind and body. These exercises include mindfulness, deep breathing, and progressive muscle relaxation, equipping you with tools to manage your emotional state and physical sensations.
How Relaxing Reduces Stress
The human body has two modes; keyed up or keyed down. Like all bodily functions those two modes serve a purpose.
We live our best lives when we're keyed down, or calm. The calm brain efficiently distributes the body's energy through the parasympathetic nervous system. Breathing is easy, the heart rate is normal, organs are functioning well, and thoughts are focused on the present moment where reality lives.
Stress and anxiety shift our brain's chemistry from calm to keyed up. The brain signals the sympathetic nervous system through our fight-or-flight mechanism called the amygdala.
Learn more about the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous system here.
We've all experienced walking out into a parking lot at night; the sympathetic nervous system helps you stay alert and aware of your surroundings. Your amygdala releases a bit of adrenaline and cortisol and, if you don't feel safe, you get someone to walk you to your car. You get into your car and safely get home.
The amygdala keeps us safe from danger.
The neurospicy brain, however, has an amygdala that mimics the meanest, loudest Karen in the universe. Our brains are at risk of an amygdala hijack: "which occurs when our amygdala, the part of the brain responsible for emotions, overpowers our rational brain regions."
It causes our brain to key up to the degree that our Central Nervous System goes into overload and we act on in ways that make things worse for us or we head towards panic.
Understanding Relaxation and Stress Reduction
Relaxation techniques can significantly reduce stress by promoting both physical and mental well-being. Here are some key ways relaxation helps in alleviating stress:
Physiological Changes
Reduced Heart Rate: Relaxation techniques can lower the heart rate, helping the body to enter a state of calm.
Lower Blood Pressure: Stress often raises blood pressure; relaxation can counteract this effect.
Decreased Muscle Tension: Relaxation helps to relieve muscle tightness and tension, which are common physical responses to stress.
Psychological Benefits
Improved Mood: Engaging in relaxation activities can lead to the release of endorphins, improving overall mood.
Enhanced Focus and Clarity: Relaxation helps clear the mind, allowing for better concentration and decision-making.
Emotional Regulation: Regular relaxation practices can enhance emotional resilience, making it easier to cope with stressors.
Mind-Body Connection
Increased Awareness: Relaxation encourages mindfulness, which promotes awareness of thoughts and feelings without judgment.
Stress Response Regulation: Techniques such as deep breathing and meditation can help regulate the body's stress response system.
Long-Term Benefits
Stress Management Skills: Regular practice of relaxation techniques can help individuals develop better coping strategies for managing stress.
Prevention of Stress-Related Illnesses: Reducing stress through relaxation can lower the risk of stress-related health issues, such as anxiety, depression, and cardiovascular problems.
Incorporating relaxation techniques into daily life can be a powerful tool for reducing stress, enhancing overall well-being, and promoting a healthier lifestyle.
OK - I want to teach you how to relax!
How To Relax
Put everything you think you know about relaxing out of your head. I'm going to walk you through a relaxation exercise that will help you reach a state of calmness and free your body and mind from tension.
Step 1: Mindfulness Check-In
The first step in your relaxation journey is to recognize your current emotional and physical state.
On a scale from 0 to 10, how emotionally distressed or physically tense do you feel right now? (0 equals total calm, while 10 represents full panic or overwhelming tension.)
Take a moment to pause, connect with your feelings, and write your number down:
Distress Rating: _____________________
This initial assessment is crucial. For instance, recent studies show that nearly 70% of adults report feeling stress in their daily lives. By identifying your distress level, you can effectively tailor your relaxation exercises.
Step 2: Deep Belly Breathing
Now that you’ve checked in with yourself, let’s move to deep belly breathing. This powerful technique aids in regulating your breath, slowing your heart rate, and activating your body’s relaxation response.
Place one hand on your stomach.
Inhale slowly through your nose for 4 counts—feel your hand rise as your belly expands.
Exhale gently through your mouth for 6 counts—feel your belly fall as you release the breath.
Repeat this process five times. As you breathe, affirm to yourself:
“I am safe. I am grounded. I can slow this moment down.”
Deep belly breathing can lower cortisol levels, the hormone responsible for stress, by up to 25%. Incorporating this into your daily routine can lead to significant improvements in your overall stress levels.
Step 3: Progressive Muscle Relaxation
Next, let’s focus on progressive muscle relaxation (PMR). This technique is especially helpful for those experiencing chronic pain or illness, enabling you to consciously release tension in your muscles.
Follow these steps, holding each muscle group tight for 10 seconds before fully relaxing:
Legs: Extend one leg, flex your toes toward your shin, hold → release. Repeat with the other leg.
Back: Arch your lower back slightly while opening your chest → hold → release.
Arms: Raise both arms straight, clench your fists, then stretch your fingers → release arms to your lap.
Shoulders: Shrug your shoulders up toward your ears → hold → release → roll them forward and back.
Jaw: Clench your teeth → hold → release → roll your jaw gently side to side.
Neck: Drop one ear to your shoulder → breathe → repeat on the other side.
Eyes: Squeeze your eyes shut tight → hold → release and let them gently close.
Incorporating deep breathing between each muscle group enhances relaxation. Regular practice of PMR has been shown to decrease anxiety and improve sleep quality for many individuals.
Step 4: Guided Imagery
Now, let’s immerse ourselves in guided imagery. This step is about creating a serene mental space that offers solace.
Picture a peaceful place: a calm beach, a tranquil mountain, or a warm, sunlight-filled room.
Imagine every detail. What do you see? What do you hear? What do you smell and feel?
Now imagine a warm waterfall pouring down your body, washing away tension from head to toe.
Repeat to yourself:
“This is my sanctuary. I can return here anytime. I am at peace.”
Spending even just 2 to 5 minutes in this mental imagery can lower anxiety and boost emotional resilience, making it an excellent tool for when life feels overwhelming.
Step 5: Re-rate Your Distress
Finally, it’s time for a follow-up check-in.
On that same scale from 0 to 10, how emotionally or physically distressed do you feel now?
Reflect and write your new number down:
Distress Rating: ________________
Many people experience a noticeable decrease in their distress level after engaging in these relaxation practices, sometimes moving down by as much as 3 to 5 points.
Relaxation Is A Skill - So Practice!
Relaxation is not just a one-time activity but a practice that you can integrate into your daily life. The exercises we’ve explored today are powerful tools for anyone facing anxiety, ADHD, chronic pain, or illness. By engaging in mindfulness, deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, and guided imagery, you can nurture a greater sense of calm and well-being.
Embrace these techniques, and always remind yourself that you can return to your peaceful sanctuary whenever life feels overwhelming.
With regular practice, calming your mind and body will become easier, revealing new levels of resilience and tranquility in your life.
Give yourself the gift of relaxation and peace—you truly deserve it!
How Often Do You Practice Relaxing?
At least once a day.
Several times per week.
A few times a month.
I don't.
Comments